Author Topic: Some Funny One Liners :D  (Read 59 times)


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Some Funny One Liners :D
« on: May 04, 2016, 11:46:00 PM »
Eat whatever you want and if someone tries to lecture you about your weight, Eat them too!

I was walking down the street, something caught my eye...and dragged it fifteen feet. 

The other day a woman came up to me and said, "Didn't I see you on television?" I said, "I don't know.  You can't see out the other way."

Be nice to your kids.  They'll choose your nursing home.

A woman of 35 thinks of having children.  What does a man of 35 think of?  Dating children.

What is the thinnest book in the world? What Men Know About Women

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

I used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead.

A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking.

I don't have a solution but I admire the problem.

Don't be so open-minded your brains fall out.

If at first you DO succeed, try not to look astonished!

If things get any worse, I'll have to ask you to stop helping me.

If I want your opinion, I'll ask you to fill out the necessary forms.

Dain bramaged.

Department of Redundancy Department.

2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2.

Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.


Why doesn't DOS ever say "EXCELLENT command or filename!"

Windows: Just another pane in the glass.

Computer - A device designed to speed and automate errors.

Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue...

ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!

Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.

"640K ought to be enough for anybody." - Bill Gates, 1981

Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...

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Some Funny One Liners :D
« on: May 04, 2016, 11:46:00 PM »